Life Gets Crazy but I’m still here…kinda

I can’t believe it’s been so long since my last update…but seriously life has just been so crazy busy that the one time I remember getting on here to make a post my mind went blank and then didn’t start again until I was in bed…of course. 😛

So…I am planning this to be a long post, unless of course the kids wake up and then it may be really short.

Valentine’s weekend went as planned and is definitely a Valentine to be reckoned with 🙂 I got there before my friend got home from work, snuck into the apartment complex and used my friends spare key to get in…such a ninja 😉 I decorated the apartment (somewhat), with banners, table center and such fun stuff. Laid out her present and card and well as one for her sister who she lives with and then while I had planned on getting things prepped for the next day… I had a glass of wine and crashed on the couch until she got there. Lol I was nearly asleep when she showed up. 😛

We enjoyed catching up and exchanging presents and cards before getting in our comfy pjs and heading to get our massages that evening! Man, oh man it was SO relaxing and just what my sore muscles needed that day!

After our massages we picked up food from Panda Express…so yummy, before heading back to the apartment to eat that, watch a movie, have some yummy chocolate and have some more wine. 🙂 We watched “The Holiday” film.

On Saturday we made yummy Texas shaped waffles which we added M&M’s to each slot along with a side of eggs & tortilla with hot sauce. That wonderful breakfast along with coffee and orange juice was amazing 🙂

We prepped our chicken marinade before picking a nail salon to go to to get our nails done. (Wow, that’s a lot of “to’s”!) I put in the chicken (of course) along with red wine, olive oil, herbs, onion, garlic, salt, and pepper.

We also mixed up and baked Creme Brûlée before leaving it in the fridge to set while we went to get our nails done. 🙂

I totally hit it off with the receptionist and little girl that was apparently a daughter of one of the ladies there and we were gabbing about our favorite books and movies and such. It was so much fun to meet a fellow book lover!!! 🙂

After our nails were done we had to go to Target to get a baby present for her sister who is having a little boy and who’s baby shower we were going to the next day. We got him some really cute outfits…adorbs! And we even saw a friend of my brother’s there with his girlfriend…it was pretty funny since neither of them live there and we just happened to see them!

We went home and made Ratatouille, which thankfully turned out so good! We had that along with pan seared chicken and rice with greens and of course more wine. 🙂  It was a delicious meal! For dessert we had chocolate covered strawberries which we had forgotten to dip earlier 😛 and hand whipped (literally!) sweet cream to go with those and the creme brûlée which turned out SO absolutely YUM-MY!!!!

Definitely going to make all of that again! Though I would most likely add more flavors to the Ratatouille and probably invest in a flame thingy for the creme brûlée. 🙂

All I can say though is that it was one of the best meals I’ve ever had and I was thoroughly satisfied with how it all turned out!

The baby shower the next day went very well even though I only knew like three people there and I did really well in the “name the book” game which was  very satisfying Lol.

I came home later that evening, it was a longer drive home than it was getting there it seemed like that time. 😦 I also missed being able to fellowship with fellow christians like crazy that day.

Now, onto some other news, the main news as to why it’s taken me so long to post. 😀

I’ve been going to a new Bible Study once a week on Tuesdays for several weeks and finally accepted an invitation to go to a meal with a friend I had met through there, Felicity, and some of her friends, she also hinted at there being a guy she wanted me to meet there.

I went and had a great time, the guy never showed up but two other guys were there from the study and along with the girls we all had a lot of fun cooking and chatting.

A week or so went by and then one of the guys from that evening/study started messaging me….we haven’t stopped yet and I’m even going to a wedding with him and some of the mutual friends we have in a couple of weeks.

Oh, and we’re taking a dance class starting tomorrow evening so we will be able to “really” dance at the wedding. I am throughly excited though I have NO idea what he is expecting.

I REALLY need a relationship manual/handbook! I have no ‘real’ practice and no idea what to expect from a ‘good’ guy. ARGGG

Anyway, between work, guys, new friends, old friends, church things, Bible studies and the like there has just been no time at all to get on here to post…I am hoping to get an app or something soon that may make it easier to post more often but don’t hold your breath!

So that’s about all there is that I can think of for the moment, the kids are up now and while one is upstairs with his legos, another is at dance and the youngest is at the table coloring…I gotta go. 🙂

I have no idea if anyone actually reads these but I am happy to keep on posting…even if it is few and far between!




The Stormy Sea

Let us learn that serving Christ does not exempt His servants from storms. If we are true Christians, we must not expect everything smooth in our journey to heaven. We must count it no strange thing if we have to endure sickness, losses, bereavements, and disappointments, just like other men. Free pardon and full forgiveness, grace along the way, and glory at the end–all this our Savior has promised to give. But He has never promised that we shall have no affliction. By affliction He teaches us many precious lessons, which without it we should never learn. In the resurrection morning we shall thank God for every storm. Our Lord Jesus Christ, as God, has almighty power. The elements knew the voice of their master, and, like obedient servants, were quiet at once. With the Lord Jesus Christ nothing is impossible. No stormy passions are so strong but He can tame them. No temper is so rough and violent but He can change it. No conscience is so disturbed, but He can speak peace to it, and make it calm. No man ever need despair. Christ can do miracles upon his heart. Christ will carry him through every danger. Christ will make him conqueror over every foe. Greater is He that is for is, than all those who are against us. Our Lord Jesus Christ is exceedingly patient in dealing with His own people. The Lord Jesus is very empathetic and full of tender mercy. He sees their weakness. He is aware of their short-comings. He knows all the defects of their faith, and hope, and love, and courage. And yet he will not cast them off. He bears with them continually. He loves them even to the end. He raises them when they fall. His patience, like His love, is a patience that passes knowledge. His heart is still the same that it was when He crossed the sea of Galilee and stilled the storm. High in heaven at the right hand of God, Jesus is still sympathizing–still almighty–still patient toward His people. Let us be more charitable and patient towards our brethren in the faith. They may err in many things, but if Jesus has received them and can bear with them, surely we may bear with them too. Let us be more hopeful about ourselves. We may be very weak, and frail, and unstable; but if we can truly say that we do come to Christ and believe on Him, we may take comfort.

_ J.C.Ryle

One Down – Two To Go

Well…I’ve already knocked one eating out off my table for the month. 🙂 Met with a dear friend tonight and thoroughly enjoyed our evening. However, I now have only two nights to eat out this month and….surprise, surprise I have already scheduled my second evening out/eating out for this Friday. So much for spreading it out. 😉

I made it to my first workout of the week too today, so only two more times that I have to go so yay me! Crossfit is definitely one of the best decision I’ve made in a while 🙂 Part of the workout was Back Squats…my neck is so sore.

Oh, another big deal for me was that I made my bed this morning…big deal for me since usually the only time I make my bed is when I change the sheets. The whole “Why make my bed since I’m only going to crawl back into it in a few hours” was my philosophy but this morning it really helped to have made it. My mind switched gears during making it and I definitely felt ‘awake’ longer I think partly because of that. So, now that’s a new goal…

#53 Make my bed every morning. 🙂

Hopefully I will actually keep that up too. Drinking water has been fairly easy and I didn’t eat any “real” sweets today either, I was even offered some candy and I said no! 🙂 I was excited that I made it through the day without it. Now to go through the next few weeks and I know it’s only going to get harder since I am basically addicted to sugar, no good. Praying I’ll make it through and break the habit. 🙂 Any tips would be highly appreciated!

So far my goals are being set in motion and I’m slowly figuring out my trips, and when to do some of my other goals, etc., I think I’m going to try to make the ratatouille and creme brulee this month or next. Perhaps around valentines… I plan on spending the weekend with one of my best friends since we both don’t have boyfriends, or such so maybe we could do that… hmmmm possible “lightbulb” moment! Haha

So, I’m going to go soak my nose in a salt solution and finish getting ready for bed before having my quiet time and hopefully feel up to doing some more writing….maybe that was TMI but..well you’re trapped reading this so… 😀


Procrastination Always Catches Up

Two more days until my vacation is officially over and I while I have had two lovely weeks off I am excited about seeing all the kiddos again.

I have had several days where I feel no motivation to get anything done sadly and so today I am trying to force it to happen since I have several things that have to get done today. Not limited to; laundry, writing, having a Quiet time, photo editing, painting for my nephew(I’ll post pictures once it’s done),  wrapping presents, and cleaning/straightening my room. I also need to send a few emails and texts about work and meetings for the upcoming week…I have been procrastinating fantastically and now I must complete these things! Argg!

My brother also has asked me to go to the movies so that will probably happen at some time…but man oh man I am going to be losing time to complete everything else. At the same time, I haven’t spent that much time with him since being off so it’s a good thing to spend/make time for family and doing something they want to do even if it inconveniences you a bit.

It just means that I now have to get all this done now. Immediately. Post haste. 🙂

Well….I guess I’ll keep this short and go attempt to accomplish most of this. Probably going to go put on a “Frasier” episode to listen/watch as I work. 🙂

Hasta La Vista fellow bloggers.

Bucket Lists, Goals, and a New Year ahead

So another year is upon us and the last one just flew by so fast that I can hardly believe it is here already. In view of this I will post just a few of my goals from last year that I accomplished  and then a list of ones I want to accomplish for this year.


1 – Color my hair – (Black)

2 – Dance under the stars – 😀

3 – Try Zumba – Not my thing.

4 – Learn to Crochet – Kind of, I started and I need to take some classes but I taught myself the gist of it.

5 – Go on a date. – It finally happened!

6 – Go on an adventure/trip alone. – I found out I love traveling by myself.

7 – Pierce my nose. – I love it!

8 – Say “yes” instead of “no.” – Did this too.

9 –  Ask a guy out – Yes, for coffee.

10 – Go to a bar – hotel bar but I count it.

11 – Get a massage.- This needs to become a regular this year!

12 – Strike up conversation with a stranger. – So many stories from this one!

13 – Eat somewhere local on a trip(no chain restaurants). Great food!

14 – Write a letter and leave it in your seat. (Did this on the train!)

15 – Visit a local park on my trip.

16 – Ride on a train.

17 – Make homemade marshmallows. So yummy!!

18 – Try something new. I tried several new drinks, traveling alone, trusting myself more…etc.,

19 – Eat oreo’s and peanut butter together.

20 – Get back into reading more regularly. 🙂

So those are just some of the things that were on my multiple bucket lists and I have a ton more that are on them. Too many to accomplish in one year.

So for 2015 here are some of my goals and things I want to accomplish….hopefully within the next 364 days I will be able to do most if not all of them 🙂

I am going to put down 52 since I’ll have 52 weeks to complete these but not necessarily going to try to complete on each week.

1 – Go Cliff Jumping. – I have no idea where yet so if you know of a place let me know!

2 – Go on three dates this year.

3 – Make ratatouille and creme brulee.

4 – Go on a trip spur of the moment with no planning.

5 – Go hunting.

6 – Take at least three trips this year.

7 – Finish my novel and send it in to publishers.

8 – Become a healthier me by continuing going to Crossfit and learning to eat healthier.

9 – Go Ice Skating.

10 – Save more money, spend less.

11 – Cut out more processed foods and sugary foods.

12 – Try acupuncture.

13 – Go stargazing.

14 – Give/Donate Blood.

15 – Go camping, rough it.

16 – Play laser tag.

17 – Make quiet time with God a habit.

18 – Get up early everyday.

19 – Write every week. (Goal is anywhere between 3 and 4 thousand words)

20 – Take Singing lessons.

21 – Level my WOW character to the highest level.

22 – Read 50 books this year.

23 – Drastically lower my hospital and chiropractor bills.

24- Take a road trip with friends.

25 – Dance in the rain.

26 – Eat Snake.

27 – Try out three local shops I’ve never been to before.

28 – Eat at three new restaurants.

29 – Workout 3 times a week.

30 – Only eat out three times or less each month.

31 – Make a Dream Catcher.

32 – Go to a concert.

33 – Enter a photography contest.

34 – Slide across the hood of a red convertible.

35 – See all of Audrey Hepburn’s movies.

36 – Ride a motorcycle.

37 – Go to a wine tasting.

38 – Go Crabbing.

39 – Get my CHL.

40 – Get a chest for my window area.

41 – Participate in the Tough Mudder race.

42- Be a zombie in a marathon run.

43 – Take piano lessons.

44 – Visit my friends out of state, in other cities more often.

45 – Memorize more Bible verses.

46 – Go to a women’s conference.

47 – Visit the shooting range regularly.

48 – Learn to play pool.

49 – Go to a drive in theater.

50 – Learn two new card games.

51 – Visit at least one national or state park.

52 – Get my ears double pierced.

So those are just a few things that are on my many, many lists and so I am going to try to tackle these this year and I’ll attempt to write about them as I accomplish them. 🙂

I would love to hear back on your thoughts of this list and any ideas on ways to help accomplish them or any additions or things I should add! If you write a blog post on your own bucket list/goals give me the link and I will go check it out.

Later Gators and Happy New Year!

About to Explode

I am a great bundle of emotion. I have so many emotions rushing through my mind that I am very frustrated and exhausted by the onslaught of them all.

You see, I just got back from a trip that I took this weekend. And the problem is that while I was there I what I consider to be both the second most stupid thing I have ever done as well as the most refreshing thing I’ve ever done.

I asked my bartender (let’s call him Dave) out for coffee after he bought my drink for me.

He said yes. Surprise.

I have never asked anyone out in my life and to do it on vacation when I will never see the man again was idiotic as I am someone who wears her heart on her sleeve. While it was freeing taking the initiative and all, it was done in a somewhat selfish act in trying to get out of my comfort zone and do something I never would normally.

It probably would have been fine but the problems have come from the aftermath since during our date I agreed to let him kiss me.

I shouldn’t have.

I have only been kissed by one other guy in my life (let’s call him Greg) and while it was one of the best things I had ever experienced I was being used and I knew it, so it has always been a tainted memory.

And now, four long years later, and with a craving that had been building slowly over all that time I longed to be held and kissed.

Believe me, Jeff certainly filled that craving and blew Greg’s kisses so far out of the water and out of my mind that I honestly don’t think I’ll ever be able to remember them again. (awesome!)

He treated me like a lady the whole time, never once assuming that he would get anything other than a kiss and I loved every. single. moment.

I hate saying I ‘regret’ it because in a lot of ways I don’t. What I regret is that I know I let myself ‘pretend that all I wanted was a kiss’ but what I really want, what I crave isn’t a ‘kiss’ or a ‘makeout session’ (that’s really what it was) but what I need is a stable, christian man who loves me and wants me.

I am saddened by my weak, sinful self that craves the satisfaction that physical pleasure brings and I am now dealing with the consequences of my actions.

I am craving to see Jeff again; I want his lips, his arms but mostly, I want his love. And that craving is not going to be filled by him and that knowledge is taking a physical toll on me now.

And I know that I will never see him again and I also know he wouldn’t love me and I don’t understand why I think he’d even want to.

I know I’m being ridiculous. I know. Believe me, I’ve tried reasoning with myself and ‘moving’ on and yet it’s so much harder to say than to do. I get attached much to easily, like I said earlier I wear my heart on my sleeve. I am also attention deprived and I tend to grasp onto whatever affection is given when offered.

I know that this will fade. It did with Greg…after several months but then again I had been with him for about eight months so months to get over him was expected.

I’m praying this runs it’s course quickly and I can think back fondly on our kisses without hurting the way I am now.

Mostly, it hurts knowing how I daydreamed and I knew it was pointless and yet I still held a sliver of hope and all that hope has been shattered and now I have to start all over again.

I brought this on myself and I will get through it.

As a very wise woman said, “You are Kind. You are Smart. You are Important.”

And I know I can fall into Jesus’ arms and beg him to fix me again, to forgive me and I know he will. I need to trust Him more fully, he will bring all things into their seasons. And if I have a special man that he’s prepared I know he’ll send him at the right time.

I just need so much patience….but patience is so hard to acquire and then to keep.

The song titled “100 years” by Five For Fighting (love them!) is on my mind right now and I don’t want to waste the years God’s given me and I have no idea how many that will even be. Maybe I’ll only live another two years or maybe I’ll live until I’m 99 and die in my bed of old age in my sleep. I have no idea.

I know I have to get over this. I have to move on. I have to trust God had a reason for allowing me to have my “magical” date on my trip and while I may never know what reason that is I know it will be used for His glory and my good…even if I have no idea how that will work out.

Maybe no one will read this or maybe someone will but they won’t understand it at all but I had to write this down and put it out there. I had to share my soul and get it out so I can breathe a little easier instead of letting it build up inside until I can only gasp out gulping sobs of despair. (Both literally and figuratively)

Now, I’m going to go fall into the arms of my great Savior and Lord, Jesus Christ.